We are not in Eden, though her scent still hangs heavy in the air. Her glory haunts us from within, in the longing moments, the epic and the intimate, when this world in all her splendor is simply not enough. We sense her calling when life frustrates, refusing to bow to 'how it ought to be", and deep down we know we were made for more.
More than the pain that is piercing my sweet friend's heart as she mourns the death of a brother, gone in his sleep, buried to this world in his youth. His wife now a widow with babies to raise. My God, we are helpless sheep; come be our shepherd.
More than our self-centered existence, led by the siren's songs of our desires, never fulfilling. We are lulled into living for our appetites, gorged and bulging with misery. And here we sit, deceived and in chains to ourselves, shackled by our good life, woefully unaware of our enslavement. My God, we are helpless sheep; come be our shepherd.
Jesus, you said, if we want to save our life, we will lose it, but if we lose our life for you, we will find it. That if we want to come after you, we deny ourselves and follow you. My God, I know it will cost me everything, but I can't hold onto this life, hard as I try. Bury the woman who tries to have it all, my way and yours. My God, I am an iron-willed sheep, come be my shepherd.
And oh, Great Shepherd, I want to live only for you, because Eden is gone, but the Kingdom is here. And when you come in the Glory of your father, there's only one flag I want to be waving, purest white in surrender to the One who is called Faithful and True. There is only one life for me this side of Eden, and it is the life of abandon.
Matthew 16: 24-27 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father’s glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what they have done.
Revelation 19:11 I saw heaven standing open and there before me was a white horse, whose rider is called Faithful and True.