Thursday, July 16, 2009

from relationship to abiding

I can't help but see the world through the lens of pregnancy - but its an undeniable portion of my existence during this season. As I sit and type, I feel the rise and fall of my baby's chest practicing breathing - preparing for life outside of the womb.

There's a portion in a book we've talked about before..."I became a Christian and All I got was this Lousy T-Shirt"...and it echo's in my spirit as I consider this child within me.Vince draws the conclusion that we were never really meant to be in relationship with Jesus - though a relationship is certainly better than religion. But I'm in a relationship with a ton of people...and I can go days or even months without connecting with them, and I'm fine. Is it the same with God? Can I go days or weeks without really connecting with him?
Check out what he has to say: (pg 33-34)

A relationship with Jesus is better than a religion with Jesus, but still, I don't think Jesus was talking about us just having a relationship with him.

For instance, one time Jesus said, "Abide in Me , and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it a abides in the vine, so neither can you, unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me, and I in him, he bears much fruit; for apart from Me you can do nothing." To abide means to live within. Jesus says he wants me to live inside of him, and he live inside of me. That doesn't sound like a relationship to me.

What if you could somehow interview a baby inside his mother's womb? And let's say you asked the baby, "Do you have a relationship with your mother?"

I think the baby would give you a really weird look. Now from the pictures I've seen, babies in their mothers' wombs look very alienlike, so you may not realize the baby was giving you a weird look. But trust me; this questions would get you a weird look.

The baby would say, "Could you repeat that?" (I'm assuming the baby can speak.)

So you ask again, "I said, do you have a relationship with your mother?"

The baby would give you another weird look and and answer, "That's what I thought you said, but I can't believe you would ask that. How do I answer? I mean yes, we do have a relationship, but c'mon it's way beyond that. I mean, I live inside of her. I can't live without her. I am totally dependent on her for everything that keeps me alive. I can't do anything without her. So yes, I guess we have a relationship, but that's a colossal understatement." (I'm assuming this baby uses cool words like colossal.)

He later goes on to say:

So when we pray to God about our relationship with him, I imagine God saying, "Did you really just say that? I mean, yes, I guess it is a relationship, but you did catch the part where I said I want us to live inside each other, right? You want to call that a relationship? You can call it what you want, but I'm inviting you into much more than a relationship. I'm offering to be the womb you exist within, and the blood that flows through your veins. I want to be the umbilical cord that brings you the fluids that sustain you, and I want to be the breath that enters your lungs when you're born, and I want to be your lungs. What I want is for you to get lost inside of me, and I want to be lost inside of you. My desire is for us to be one..."

To abide. Wow, what a concept, what a life. His strength, his life, his love, his joy, his identity flowing through my existence, giving me everything I need to not only survive, but to grow and thrive into the girl he created me to be. This is my heart's desire, Jesus.


j said...

I love that anology of a child in the womb in relation to "abiding." Can't really think of a better way to describe it. Definitely my heart's desire be lost inside of Him always.

And thank you so much for your comments on my post the other day...your thoughts, your heart and your encouragement were such comfort to my soul. You were able to pinpoint and describe much of what I have been feeling but have been struggling to express. It was assuring to know I am not alone and there is someone out there who can relate to much of my struggle. You do have a heart of gold. I'd love to get together...and soon...these babies will be here before we know it!

Woollard House said...

Abide in me and I in you, Come Lord Jesus. Abide in US!!!!