Friday, November 6, 2009

#5 Love is selfless

"[Love] is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered" - 1 Corinthians 13:5

One of my friends who goes to our church told me about how he used to become easily angered with his kids. At his children's slightest disobedience, he would lose it: yelling, spanking, punishing, words of condemnation, etc. After years of parenting this way, he became a Christian and started attending our church. As he started to submit himself to the Way of love, God gave him an epiphany about becoming easily angered. He told me how God showed him that he became angry so easily not because his kids' trespasses were so great, but rather because they were so inconvenient for him. He began to see that his anger was really quite selfish because he didn't want to have to deal with disobedient or unruly kids. 

Being rude and getting angry easily are really symptoms of a larger disease: selfishness. What  causes us to be rude or become easily angry are not offenses so morally deplorable that they merit a strong reaction. No, they're usually just inconvenient for us (think traffic jam or kid crying at the grocery store; someone didn't do their job and now you're stuck making up for it). 

In his book "Walking With God," John Eldredge writes that when a person's negative reaction to a situation in their life is significantly more severe than the situation merits, it's usually a sign of a wound in their heart that the situation has brought to the surface. This world is full people who are the walking wounded, and selfishness is their best attempt to protect their wounds or save themselves from further pain. And in our vain attempts to save ourselves, we commit grievous acts against others, which usually merit selfish and sinful responses from those we hurt as they try to protect their wounds.

This viscous cycle will continue until someone is willing to love selflessly. That means someone who is willing to take the offense, the inconvenience, the pain, and not retaliate. The Bible says that when Jesus was being tried to die on the cross, he did not open his mouth to defend himself. He knew that he was innocent. He knew that he was God's son. But he also knew that his act of selfless love on the cross could bring healing and restoration to the entire world. As 1 Peter 4:8 says, "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sin."

Jesus' one act of love on the cross covered the sin of the entire world. But he doesn't just want us to say, "thanks, man, heaven's gonna be great!" and go on living in the same old patterns of selfishness and depravity. He wants to see us follow his example and see our realm of influence be transformed by love, but that means the selfishness within us has to die.

Jesus said, "if anyone would come after me, he must take up his cross and follow me." I used to think that was such a condemning statement. Like Jesus was standing there shaking his finger and saying, "I died. You have to die too!" But I'm starting to realize Jesus made that demanding statement because he just wants us to love each other. And love is selfless.


APK

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

he's good ,but he's no Aron Kirk